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Loving Your Husband Before You Even Have One


September 17, 2018
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Timeless Truths Empower Female Students

It is common for today’s college woman to consider herself progressive in relationships.

She is free to make any choice she wants. No longer are there any cultural taboos.

She can enjoy sex without all the messy relationship stuff.

Marriage might be in her “maybe later” plans, but for now it’s all about acquiring experiences.

So are the principles in Titus 2:4-5 relevant for her life right now?

Even before she is “ready to settle down”?

If they are, then older women should be influencing these younger women in key areas of relationships and life.

But, as we already know, college women aren’t exactly flocking to the Bible and older women for advice.

Instead, they are looking to their friends and the culture around them for how to navigate it all.

But what if the older women know things the younger women don’t?

  • That the popular philosophies of the day over promise and under deliver.
  • That they eventually leave women empty and unfulfilled.
  • That “having it all” now could actually be taking away from the life they hope to have someday.

As a young woman, I discovered the hard way that many ideas promoted by our culture don’t work.

I listened to them and they left me with an empty life, a guilty conscience, a failed relationship, and a broken engagement.

My life was a mess.

When Jesus stepped into my life as a college student, He changed everything for me.

Following Christ in the years that followed wasn’t easy, but the Biblical truths I learned and put into practice as a single woman have paid off in my life and relationships—especially in my marriage.

If I read one more current article promoting the “benefits” of hook-up culture, I might just blow my top.

The choices that look so great in college don’t look so good down the road.

When I see a young woman making decisions I know might damage the future she hopes for, only to see everyone around her cheering her on, well, it just breaks my heart.

I had to speak up and say something.

So, I did.

A few years ago, I started a workshop at our annual student conference, and I called it Loving Your Husband Before You Even Have One.

I gave four biblical choices a young woman could make even while she was single that could help her life and relationships—many principles taken from the Titus 2 passage.

Sitting on the floor, crowded around my feet, they overflowed our meeting space.

At conferences over the next several years, I shared a few more choices, and each year they packed out our space.

Eventually the material became a book that released in December 2017.

I printed what I thought would sell in a year. It sold out in six weeks. Seven months later, we are in our third printing.

Look what God has done!

I share the Ten Commandments.

I tell them they need a relationship with God.

I tell them not to have sex before they get married.

I talk about reaching the nations.

And they are reading it, and they like it!

The crazy thing is—it’s not just the church girls, but the party girls too. I couldn’t be more pleased.

What a reminder that God’s word is timeless for all generations—even for today’s progressive college woman.

Get copies of “Loving Your Husband Before You Even Have One” for your campus on Amazon or at KimVollendorf.com

What readers are saying about Loving Your Husband Before You Even Have One:

This book is absolutely AMAZING. I am a college student, and it relates to my life more perfectly than any other book I have read. It has helped me prepare not only for my future husband, but has also helped with my friendships in general as well as giving me life/adult advice. Pretty quick read, but more importantly I couldn’t put the book down! Many of my sorority sisters have been reading it and it has changed their lives too! Thanks Kim! —Amazon review
I loved this book because Kim wrote in a way that you felt like you were sitting across the table from her and soaking in all her years of wisdom and experience. Kim spoke from experience, and gave tangible applications. Yes, this book is about loving your husband before you even have one, but it’s so much of developing into a godly woman at an early age. I truly treasure this book, and I hope this book can make it in the hands of every young women! —Amazon review
YES YES YES. Kim hits the nail on the head with every single point she makes. So applicable to anyone 17+ who is single, in a relationship, or questioning God’s plan for her life. Kim serves as the cool big sister, while still instilling so much wisdom in this book. It’s easy to read, and downright laugh out loud funny at times. –Amazon review